October 23rd, 2010 - Sex and the City 2

Well, this wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. It's actually a bit better than the first movie. Not much better, mind. And no where near as good as the best of the show. I did laugh out loud a good half dozen times though. That is about the only nice thing about this movie, though.

It's the show, only far less witty, and set in Abu Dhabi. Carrie is starting to get bored with her marriage, Charlotte is stressed about her kids and her hot new nanny, Miranda is stressed about work, and Samantha is stressed about menopause and getting older. Cue many cocktails and whining conversation peppered with puns and the occasional legitimately funny line. Eventually, Samantha gets them all a trip to Abu Dhabi, where they all learn a valuable lesson. Except Samantha, because she's cool like that.

The biggest problem is that it's all so unneeded. The show wrapped everything up perfectly. The first movie was terrible mostly because it tainted our final memories of the four. At least in this one, it's almost a parody of that. Random attractive men show up for no reason in, quite literally, the middle of nowhere. The plot is secondary to getting the women to beautiful location and shooting them wearing very expensive clothes. Miranda and Charlotte's arcs are just slightly reworked rehashes of what we've seen before. The biggest problem facing these women is stagnation. Stagnation in their lives, their careers, their families. And the movie itself continues this. These are the same characters we've seen for over 10 years. Nothing substantial has changed for most of them. And the films just demonstrate, beyond a doubt, that nothing will change.

Also, the film has the song Single Ladies. I hate that song. I hate it when Beyonce sings it. I hated it when Justin Timberlake sang it on SNL. I hated it when one of the Jonas brothers did it. I even hated it when they did it on Glee. It is not a good song. It's boring, irritating, and is borderline sexist. I want a moratorium called on this song ever appearing in anything ever again. Fuck that song.

This is a surprisingly benign review. I was expecting to tear this movie apart. I just really feel kind of sorry for it. Sex and the City has grown up and became lame, boring, stagnant. If you're a fan of the show, you'll probably feel obliged to watch this. If you felt burned by the first movie, this is slightly better. Just don't expect it to make you a convert if you didn't like what came before it.